Chinese Diva
by Lexa W. Lee, daughter
Kuo Tsuo Ying was born in Tianjin, northeastern China in August 1931, lived a while in Taiwan, was married in Tokyo, Japan in 1953, and died in Solana Beach, California in April 2017. She was eager to join her husband, who died in 2016. Her English name was Joan, and she was a diva in four countries.
All through her life, she collected beautiful things. It didn't matter whether she could afford them or not; she couldn't resist. She always had a flair for drama, designing her own dresses, having them made to order (fussing over every step); she could not bear to let any of them go, even years after they went out of style. She bought full bolts of rich silks, lace, and velvet in China, Taiwan, and Japan. Her wardrobe was a combination of classical Chinese dresses and Western style outfits, pairing them with scarves, showy earrings, and huge sunglasses a la Audrey Hepburn. Her father taught her calligraphy as a child, and she collected many books about Chinese art, learned ikebana, collected stylized Japanese ceramic, glass, and bamboo vases for her flower arrangements, and exhibited at shows.
In Japan, she bought crates of dinner sets, some of which remained unused and unopened for over 40 years. She thought they were too beautiful to use. There was Noritake bone china from the 70s, Chinese cloisonne ware in yellow, turquoise, and rose pink, traditional clay and ceramic teapots, Japanese lacquer ware, even a sterling silver coffee and tea serving set that remained in their original boxes.
And of course, there was furniture. A heavy teak room divider depicting the four seasons plus an American sofa set in a rich green and white jacquard served as the backdrop for many family photos. There was also a teak coffee table and end table set, occasional tables in rosewood, marble lamps. What she didn't buy, friends and relatives gave her. Those she rarely liked, but a diva is always sentimental, so she put them away and kept them.
Joan's urge to collect may have been her way of trying to recapture her early childhood, when her family lived in a large house in Beijing. They had house servants, a limo, and a chauffeur who wore white gloves. Her father served as Chinese consul general in Japan, Taiwan, and Hong Kong. But when Mao defeated the Nationalist Army and turned China red, the family was blacklisted and all their property confiscated, something that happened all over China. Joan never quite recovered from the loss of the house, everything in it, and the status her family had enjoyed. Joan never forgot; a diva doesn't forget such things. But what affected her most was her parents' decision to split the family apart.
They didn't think their daughters would be safe in Beijing, so Joan's father took his two girls to Tokyo as refugees. One of Joan's brothers escorted them, fearful and anxious, to the train station before the Red Army overran the city in 1949. Joan's mother, a brave and capable woman, stayed on in Beijing with three sons, who had scored well on the national college exam and gained entry to university. It was a dream the family was loathe to sacrifice, despite the uncertainty ahead.
Occupation-era Japan was bleak, money and food were scarce, and the three refugees constantly worried about the rest of the family. Joan never saw her mother again, never found out how her mother died (only after 40 years did Joan return to China. She and her siblings embraced, wept, ate, then went shopping). Joan learned to speak English in a Catholic school and attended Sophia University in Tokyo, became an illustrator for the US Army, and married a Nationalist Chinese major working for the UN. She wore a wedding dress with a 21 inch waist, attended by her father and sister. They had two children, moved to Okinawa, and later emigrated to America. Joan and TS settled in Encinitas, bought a commercial greenhouse, and grew houseplants until the 90s. They were well into their 70s when they passed.